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BREAKING NEWS! TRUETELLERS OPERATIONS IN DIRE STRAITS AFTER ACCIDENT!
Colonel Ricardo Lopez was a lesser known Army veteran that fought in the Iraq War during America's "War on Terror." He directly opposed the war, however Ricardo fought for his country. A brave man, Ricardo saved two of his fellow soldiers after an IED had blown up a vehicle in their convoy. Ricardo got out of the armored vehicle and rushed toward his fallen compatriots. When he arrived, he saw their mutilated bodies. One man's legs were completely blown off. Ricardo quickly pulled him to safety during the ensuing gunfire risking his own life to save his fellow soldiers. In his book, "Pickle Suited Soldiers: A Children's Book." Ricardo explains that once he took the men behind cover, he began to shout at them. "Do you realize something? Do you realize? You will make it out of this!" he shouted to the gravely injured men. Ricardo looked to the West seeing a man on the roof holding a weapon in his hands. He quickly shouted to the man on the 50cal machinegun, "GET THAT GODDAMN STUFF OFF OF THERE AND FAST!" The gunner turned with a fierce might unloading onto the rooftop where this man had gotten an advantage on them. He quickly spoke up over the gunfire, "I'm working on it!" before dispatching of the terrorist scum on the roof. Ricardo went on to win a Medal of Bravery awarded to him by one of our greatest presidents George W. Bush. Since then, Ricardo has began drawing his own series of comic books detailing his fictional self's life. He has also began implementing himself into the hippie lifestyle becoming a fierce advocate in anti-war sentiment.
Dr. Jordan Peterson is a revolutionary clinical psychologist, YouTuber and author. He wrote the infamous book "12 Rules to Life" which details rules for young males to control their lives and destiny. As a devout Christian, Mr. Peterson loves to teach young men about the founding's of Christianity and Jesus Christ. Dr. Peterson has also expressed his distain for Judaism and the people who make up this fake religion. He recently came out in an interview saying "I do not believe Israel or Palestine are legitimate. If it was up to me, we would just nuke both these freakazoids off the map and go on with our lives." He has been staunchly opposed to Jewish influence in the US government. He has come back from extended time away due to coming down with HIV, and is now back to podcasting full time.
Sir Jordie of Jordan is the prophet of an off-shoot of Islam that directly coincides with Christianity. Mr. Jordan has a been a very vocal supporter of reformatting the Quran to a more tech friendly environment. Jordie is also known for his various exploits into the realm of deep sea diving. Jordie accomplished the furthest deep sea dive, cementing himself in the history books. In his free time, he goes to less fortunate countries preaching the word of the holy apostle Gru whose pages have been recently discovered in the "Dead Sea Scrolls." They say Gru and his followers, "Minions" as he referred to them, led themselves on a holy pilgrimage to what is now modern day Vatican City. When they arrived, they were greeted with warmth and compassion for they were following their holy journey.
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